All grown up..

6th graders in Korea are about 13 years old. From the start of the semester to now, I have watched my students grow out of their sweet adorable phase and officially enter the beginnings of being teenagers. I now catch my boys, who once loved me in a platonic fashion, talking to me while staring at two things that are not my eyes. Their compliments, which were once precious and innocent, now come in a flirtatious manner. No longer can I lean over their desks to help them with their work, and  I must now limit all and any body contact to high fives at the VERY MOST.

I didn't see it coming, everybody warned me, but I had this hope that they would stay innocent and adorable forever. I was in denial for a while, my coteacher would tell me how he can see the difference, but me.. no I didn't see it, in my eyes they still were my little ones. But it all changed in one day, with one incident.

I had handed out a worksheet to the class and my students were completing them at their desks. The worksheet I handed out had a few areas that I knew some of the students would need help with, so while giving the instructions I told the class if they needed help with anything they were to come to me at my desk. The students came up and one by one I helped them out. One of my boys came up and I began to explain what he was supposed to do. I went through the same explanation that I used with the other students to help clarify.As I was giving the explanation, I felt like he was looking at me, but not focusing on what I was saying. 

Me: "Do you understand?"

Him: .......

Me: "Do you understand?"

Him: "oh, no teacher."

I  noticed that while he was looking at me, he wasn't looking me in the eye but I couldn't figure out WHAT he was looking at. I checked my face in the computer's reflection thinking maybe I had something on it, nope. I looked back at him and he was still staring elsewhere, so I followed his gaze, which went straight down my straight down my shirt. This isn't the first time I had encountered this problem from men, but this was my student. My innocent, sweet, adorable student, not some adult pig thinking with the wrong head.

I clapped my hands in front of his face and tore him from whatever inappropriate thoughts that were going on in his mind. He immediately turned beet red, mumbled sorry and scurried back to his desk. I was just as embarrassed as he and put on a sweater even though it was 85 degrees (29C) and humid. And that is how I taught my next 5 classes, despite my boiling innards and being drenched with sweat.

This opened my eyes, I now see my boys in a different light. While I still love them and enjoy teaching them, they no longer are adorable or sweet. They now have joined ranks with the other teenage boys (and many grown men) and are predators with a one track mind.

#CHEERSTOTURTLENECKSANDTOPBUTTONS

Photos: Sports Day and My Sweet, Sweet Children

This week my school, as well as many other schools in Korea, held Sports Day. Put simply, Sports Day is an entire day devoted to a mass competitive P.E class. The students get together and they compete in different physical events. The groups who win the most events receive a small prize. This year was my first Sports Day and I had an amazing time. Luckily,  I didn't have a designated job like the other teachers so I  was able to circulate among my students, watch them compete, cheer them on and take as many photos as I could.

Photos of a few of the events

6th and 5th Grade students

3 leg race

Ball carry race

Pig Hop Wrestling (Last man standing = winner)

When the teacher blew the whistle the students had to rotate clockwise with out letting the sticks fall to the ground.

The students had to pass the balls backwards one by one and put them in a basket at the finish line.

Jumping Rope. Team with the most consecutive jumps wins.

Capture the flag. Students had to take the flags off their opponents backs, last team standing wins.

Shoe throw. Students took turns kicking off their shoes trying to land them in a circle  for points.

Photos of my Sweet, Sweet Children (mostly my 6th graders) ^^

My favorite 6th grade class

Some of my favorite boys.

If I had to adopt children, they would be them. 

My school year has so far been absolutely amazing. Despite the at times demonic 2nd graders, my students really do make my day, everyday. As the 2/3 mark of my contract approaches, the question is, will I re-sign for a 2nd year?

#CHEERS2MYSWEETSWEETCHILDREN

Being picked up by a 6th grader....

Today in class I heard the greatest pick up line ever. Too bad the person who used it on me is a CHILD (and my student) because it might of worked if he were 10 years older.

Student: "Teacher are you a gay?"
Me: "No"
Student: "Then why do you wear that?" (I wear a rainbow bracelet)
Me: "Because I like it."
Student: "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Me: "No"
Student: "Why?"
Me: "Because I haven't met the right guy."
Student: "But you meet me."

 I love my 6th graders.

#CHEERS2MYSTUDENTSMAKINGMYEVERYDAYS

English names

School is officially back in session. Today marks the beginning of the new school year. My angelic 5th graders have now become my demon 6th graders and I have a new batch of wide eyed, easily impressed and absolutely adorable 5th graders who make me think for 40 minutes that I actually might want children.


This year I am now teaching my 6th grade classes with Mc. Dreamy, my young and extremely attractive office mate who to my benefit sits at the desk right across from me. (NOT only is he dreamy he is also an amazing teacher/disciplinary). Mc. Dreamy came up with the idea to allow the students to choose English names.

When I explained to the children that they could pick their own English names I expected them to take a few minutes to get into the activity, I was wrong. As soon as I finished the sentence "Today I want you to pick your own English names." One student's hand shot in the air. If this were me 6 weeks ago, I would have gracefully skipped calling on this particular student, but 6 weeks makes you forget.

Me: "Yes?"
Student: "Call me ZOMBIE!"

I had passed around a paper for the kids to write their new names besides their Korean ones after my beloved Zombie announced his new name the students began to fight over the paper. Actually, the boys began to fight over the paper. It was as if he opened the flood gates for their imaginations. I had to pass out a second sheet just for the girls because they refused to partake in that madness. I sat on my desk answering spelling questions that were being thrown my way, helping some students choose respectable names, denying inappropriate requests from others but mainly avoiding getting myself caught up in the middle of the insanity. After 15 minutes I called order.

Boys: "insert Korean phrase for more time here"
Me: "Say it in English."
Token boy who speaks English (later named Captain Korea): "Can we have more time please Kala Teacher?"

I am a sucker for English, especially when it is polite, so I easily gave in and gave them 10 minutes longer.

I collected the attendance sheets and quickly scanned them over realizing that like so many other English teachers before me,  I had made the mistake of letting the students choose WHATEVER name they would like. But here I was, I couldn't go back on my word.

The girls names were mainly normal. Most of them asked for my help and are currently named after people I know, my high school basketball teammates, my old coworkers and of course Beyonce, Madonna and Hilary (Clinton). The few girls that strayed on the wild side chose names such as, Hello Kitty, Tom and Queen Coffee.

Joe was a popular name among my students and I had to have a Rock, Paper, Scissors battle to see who would get to claim it in 4 of my 5 classes. I didn't understand why out of ALL names in the English language they would choose Joe. I dated a Joe (his English name) who also was an ESL student (learned English as his second language) and never asked but I always wondered why he didn't choose to be Michael, Sean even Joseph, something that was more than just plain ol' Joe. So I asked my students why.

Me: "Why do you all like Joe?"
Joe (the Rock, Paper, Scissors champ): "Because I can spell it."

I don't know what I expected the answer to be but I now completely understand why Joe is popular among the ESL crowd.

After I eliminated all of the duplicate names I began role call. I was going to hold a typical role call where the teacher reads the name and the student raises their hand but I didn't have faith in myself not to laugh hysterically after seeing some of the names I would have had to read. So instead I had the students go around the class and stand up and introduce themselves with their new names. I wasn't sure if I thought that this would make it easier for me to keep myself together, but it didn't.

The students in this particular class were extremely animated when introducing themselves, in character if they were named after somebody particular or loud if they were extremely proud of their invented name.

The first three boys stood up together and stated their names,


Student1: "I am Monday."
Student2: "I am Tuesday."
Student3: "I am Friday!"

I understood Friday, who doesn't like Fridays? But Monday and Tuesday...weird kids.

Student: "I am Sorry."
Me: "Why? What did you do? You don't have a name?"
Student: "MY NAME IS SORRY."

Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Sorry......

Student: "I am SOJU!"
Me: "No."
Student:  "I am WHISKEY."
Me: "No again."
Student:"I am CIGARETTE"
Me: "No, you are Candy"

Monday, Tuesday, Friday, Sorry and Candy (who is a male)....


One table of boys decided to go with an Avengers theme, Loki, Captain Korea, Hulk and Spiderman. I told him Spiderman wasn't an Avenger but according to him I "don't know anything cool." I decided not to argue but I do plan on showing the Avengers midway through the semester to prove Spiderman wrong.

Monday, Tuesday, Friday, Sorry, Candy, Loki, Captain Korea, Hulk and Spiderman.....

One of my girls decided to be Sugar Lips. I couldn't figure out an appropriate way to tell her why she shouldn't want to be called that name so I just let her keep it. I am sure I am the only person who speaks English well enough at my school to understand the potential inappropriateness of it anyways.

Monday, Tuesday, Friday, Sorry, Candy, Loki, Captain Korea, Hulk, Spiderman and Sugar Lips..... 

But having a 12 year old Korean boy slam his hands on the desk, stand up and proudly state "My name (dramatic pause) is Ba-raCk Insane Obam-A (He meant Barack Hussein Obama) was the icing on the cake to my already hilarious day.

So in this particular class I now have Monday, Tuesday, Friday, Sorry, Candy, Loki, Captain Korea, Hulk, Spiderman, Sugar Lips and Barack Hussein Obama.

With in all of my classes it just so happens every single one of the guys names that I have dated was selected, I just happen to unintentionally included their names on my list of example name the kids could use. Coincidentally my 3 most favorite girls are named Toni, Dianne and Krystle (the names of my three best friends). I have one boy named Potter and his best friend is named Harry. Edward, Bella and Jacob are all in the same class. Kobe Bryant and Lebron James are deskmates and they sit across from Hurricane and BadBear.

My students names range from Sally to Larva, John to Flower Fairy, needless to say this is going to be an entertaining school year.


#CHEERS2CREATIVITY

(I stand corrected. According to my nerdy neighbor Spiderman IS an Avenger in the comic books)

Bucket List

Before winter vacation I completed the textbook with my classes. Now that school is back in session and I have 2 weeks left in the semester I am able to teach whatever I want, granted it is in and deals with English somehow. Today I thought that teaching my students a popular English idiom along with a few activities would not only be easy but also fun for the students.

The idiom that I selected was "kick the bucket." To introduce the topic I started the class with 2 videos, the first was a video of a person literally just kicking a bucket and the second was a video with Elmer Fudd and Bugs Bunny using the term in context of its not-literal meaning (to die). I asked the students what happened in the first video and what they thought Elmer Fudd meant when he sang "Bugs Bunny kicked the bucket" in the second video. I went over the definition of the term and examples of how it could be used, giving the students example sentences. I then showed them a 3rd video clip. This was a clip of the movie The Bucket List. I showed this clip as an introduction to the day's activity, creating our own bucket list.

Before allowing the students to create their own bucket lists I surveyed the  class on different things that they might want to do before they kicked the bucket.  I asked them  to raise their hands if they would like to do the activity I showed on the screen. Some of the activities that I included were; get married, have kids, visit California, climb a tall mountain, be on TV and go to University. I did this to give the students some examples of different types of things that can go on bucket lists and to hopefully help them come up with their own ideas. After the class survey I allowed them to make their own.

I knew the lesson would be enjoyable to the students but I underestimated how much fun they would actually have. While they were creating their lists I was bouncing around the classroom from student to student being questioned on spelling and phrasing of different things that they wanted to put on their lists. EVERYBODY wanted my help, I have never felt so popular and useful in my life.  Both of my classes continued to work on their lists even when the period ended. Some of the lists were typical, some were boring (in my opinion) and then there were the lists that were GENIUS. Here are some highlights

Kala Teacher's Classroom's Bucket List common answers

- to visit America (top answer, I've apparently left a good impression on my students)
- to become a successful businessman
- to be a millionaire
- to be an Olympic athlete
- to be a teacher like Kala Teacher
- to go to Russia
- to see Big Bang (this is a KPop group)
- to meet Big Bang
- to get Big Bang's signatures
- to marry Big Bang
(her entire list dealt with Big Bang)
- to travel around the world
- to travel to space
- to visit Japan
- to be a pilot (an many other different professions)

The BEST and funniest answers from Kala Teacher's Classroom's Bucket Lists

- to never get married, ever.
- to buy a person and make them my slave
- to marry myself
- to wrestle a crocodile
- to eat that crocodile
- to build a rocket and blow up my sisters room
- to marry Kala Teacher
- to go to Las Vegas
- to be immortal
- to live in (Korean video game name here) world and kill (friend's name here)
- to fly like a bird and shoot lasers from my talons
- to have a wife who can cook and clean and make handsome babies
- to have many ladies

and the NUMBER 1 answer

- to make it sprinkle

After laughing uncontrollably I taught him the correct phrase,  "make it rain." 
(for all you older readers out there, to " make it rain" means to throw money in the air so it rains down over people)

As the I am coming down to the end of my first semester in Korea as a teacher, I am realizing how much I have enjoyed my students. Even through the countless times I have been ready to strangle them they really have added and continue to add to the wonderful experience I am having in here. While I am SOOOOO READY for my vacation get-a-way, returning to work won't be difficult at all. As my mom and somebody near and dear to my heart have told me, love what you do and you'll never work a day in your life.


#CHEERS2MYSTUDENTS


Kala Teacher's Bucket List

1-visit all of the World's continents
2- learn how to juggle
3- run a race in a foreign country
4- skydive, bungee jump and hang glide
5-swim in all the oceans
6-learn 3 languages (conversational level) 2 down :) 1 to go
7- do the splits, both ways
8- be the person that somebody will never forget
9- drive across America
10- learn how to drive an automatic
11- ride an elephant
12- love somebody
13- leave an HUGE tip for a random server
14- be able to do the scorpion yoga pose
15- to officiate a gay or lesbian wedding on US capitol building grounds

Kid's say the darnedest things...

A typical cliche blog about the sh*t my students have said to me.

6:
Student: "Kala Teacha I buy you candy."
Me: "Thank you! Where is it?"
Student: "I ate it."

5:
I went to school with mis matching socks.
Student: "Kala Teacher you're a fashion terrorist!"

4:
After showing my class a picture of LeBron James
Student: "Your brother?"
Me: "No"
Student: "Yes, you have same skin."
Me: "All black people are not related"
Student: "Yes huh! You have same dad."

3:
After showing a picture of Chris Paul wearing a baseball hat
Me: "What is he wearing?"
Student: "A black face."

2:
Student: "Why do you have spots?"
Me: "They are freckles and I was born this way."
Student: "No, spots, like dog."

1:
Student: "Teacher, perm-a?"
Me: "No, natural"
Student (under his breath as he walks away): "Liar."

teaching my students the cha-cha slide...

Where is The Bookstore? was the title of last week's lesson in our textbook. The focus of this lesson was teaching the students how to give and understand directions.  We (my CO and I) always introduce a new song with each lesson, something that relates in someway or another. Obviously, since I was teaching directions the no brainer song to include was DJ Casper's The Cha Cha Slide.

Coincidentally, last week our school had class productions. Each homeroom class put together some type of performance to present to parents, faculty and other classes. My co-teacher decided that we too should put something together for the 5th grade production. Because we are  specialty subject teachers we do not have a homeroom class, instead we teach every 5th grade homeroom class English 2/3 periods a week. In order for us to put something together we had to use the ENTIRE 5th grade class, which is roughly about 180 students.

We decided to go with a song and dance performance. My CO organized our performance in 3 segments; the first, a select group of students danced on stage to the song "Can you join us" while the rest of the students in the audience would sing. Then we would have the entire 5th grade class dance the cha-cha slide in the audience, followed by the entire 5th grade class singing the "I can" song.

Organizing what we were going to do was easy enough, teaching the students the dances (mainly the Cha-Cha Slide)  was another story.

While the cha-cha slide is an easy dance to learn and do, it isn't easy to do well. It requires rhythm, hip motion and for a lack of a better word, swag. You can't teach these things, they are like natural instincts. All dogs can swim, well certain races naturally have the ability to dance well. I personally wouldn't vouch and say that Korean was one of these races.

So teaching my students the cha-cha slide was an adventure. At first, the only students who would actually even attempt to do the dance were  the goofy boys who pretty much just made a mockery of it the entire time. The rest of the students would cling to their chairs as if they were clinging on for life or death, but we didn't give up.  I would literally  tear my students from their chairs and  force them to dance. As the week progressed more students began to willingly participate. It eventually got to the point where I had students asking me to let them practice in my classroom during lunch time.

When my students first started to learn the dance  they looked like a bunch of cardboard cut-outs. Stiff, boring, no flavor or attitude. Teaching the steps to the cha-cha was easy, but getting them to sway their hips and move their arms while doing it was not. Because I speak no Korean (beyond being polite and important terms to shop with) explaining to my students how to groove and feel the music was difficult. I would have to move their hips and arms for them (in a totally appropriate manner!) and demonstrate myself. . We might have danced the cha-cha slide well over 100 times.

But come D-Day they got it! My CO and I danced on the stage as our mass of students did the dance in the audience and our performance was AWESOME. The parents LOVED it and the Principal was extremely impressed that we got the ENTIRE 5th grade class to do something as a group with out having any form of destruction occur. Both the Principal and Vice at lunch expressed how much they enjoyed our performance in their best English, I received many emails from other teachers telling me how great of a job we did and the students we so proud of themselves. And even after all the reluctance that my students felt towards the dance in the beginning, the day after the production my students begged  me to allow them to do it one last time.

I do not yet have the video of the actual performance but for now I have a few videos from lunch time practices. Enjoy :)

Can You Join Us Song

Cha-Cha Slide

#CHEERS2MYSTUDENTSFORBEINGAWESOME